I have set my birthdays and new year celebrations as milestones of life: times to sit back and evaluate the past, the present and take the lead for the future.
2008's birthday was over 5 hours ago. I hardly had time/space to sit down for such an evaluation at the Martin Solveig performance so now is the time.
As I prepare my psychological balance sheet for the year before, something strikes me. It's a clean record! Debit and credit numbers match! First time in history, I have no carry-over liabilities! No relationship that needs a fix, no goal unattained, no unsolved problems, no regrets, no broken-hearts, no imagined obstacles, no burdens pressing hard on my conscience... Either by elaborating and solving them, or by making myself look less appealing to them, I have left all-troublemakers and mind-invaders behind!!!
When doing this, I experienced a little more than over a billion different emotions within the past 365 days, none of them taken for granted. From these emotions, epiphanies, reasonings, I have learnt... a lot... Today, I can look a stranger in the face and hear what goes on in his/her mind. Sure I can be better but I stand a strong position on my way to being an uber-empath.
I even started a new blog to write specifically about the dynamics of the mind, but I dismissed the initiative quickly. What I know may be used for someone's disadvantage and I won't risk that. There were times when I miss-leaded sociopaths and narcissists about how to see through people so they were completely harmless when they practiced my recommendations but I need not waste much energy on this.
No carry-overs this year. Result is clear. I have what I need: only the essentials and no residuals. The thing is, headed nowhere, I am now at the crossroads. A lot of roads diverge in a yellow wood and I'll probably take the one less travelled by as I advance from "very young" to "young", then to "not so young" :)
